Auditions

So Hudson Music Club auditions are on Saturday. I only found out today, but I think I'll do it. I mean, I haven't got much to lose, I guess I'm jut not all that sure how I feel about it. It's as is all of a sudden I feel a little stupid or something, as if I've been imagining myself getting some big important role and realising that that's just retarded. I've never acted before, so I'm not sure how well that'll work out for me. I suppose I've got to start somewhere though, and there's nothing wrong with trying something new. Besides, I might like it.

I guess my only problem now is cash. I wouldn't be getting paid for this gig, so I'm still not entirely sure it's worth doing. Then again, it's possible that I only get a chorus part, in which case I'm not sure I'll do it. I just don't want to spend all my Sundays there when I could be working somewhere else and earning money if all that I get out of it is the "satisfaction" of being the random girl in the back. But at the same time, shows are so incredibly fun and I would hate to miss those times backstage where everyone's excited and having a good time. It's really tough to find where my priorities lie when I've got Europe in mind. I guess, if worst comes to worst, I will ask my parents if I can borrow some of the money if I can't make the payments in time. It'll be a drag to pay back, but at least I'll get the best of both worlds. Theatre and Europe. Damn, that would be awesome! Providing, of course, that I can still make it to Europe with the waiting list and all that crap. I wish I could have worked more this summer.

I hate to sound like a victimised emo kid and all, but damn, it's not my fault that I didn't work more this summer. I handed in applications, I aced the interview, I got the job. Then they just didn't call. I though, as well as my mom and dad, that as soon as they opened they would fix things and get organized. To my dismay, however, they didn't open when they said they would, and they didn't get organized. It's left me highly frustrated and at loss for things to do. Well, I guess it's too bad for them, because I'm putting in resumes elsewhere and I'll quit as soon as I can. Too bad, so sad, they suck and that's crappy. I just wish I would have known ahead of time, that's all.

*sigh*. Now I'm all angsty and worried about money and stuff. Goddamnit, I'm sixteen! AND SO ANGSTY ABOUT RANDOM SHIT!! There. It's been acknoledged. Let the healing process begin!!!

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I repeat, let the healing commence!!!

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Better luck next time I guess. Oh well, talk to you later.