I know it's been awhile, so sue me.
Hmm. I don't know how I could type the sound I would like to start with. So just make weird noises, I'm sure you'll get it eventually.
I've been hanging out with Thea and friends all week-end, and I've decided that I can't fucking wait until I go to university. I'm serious, I really want to get out of cegep. I'm pretty sure the only thing that I want to stay for is to learn how to play guitar next semester. Other than that I just can't wait. I mean, Marco is being kind of an ass-hole lately, but he's still sort of the only person that I can hang out with most of the time, and I don't want to be totally mean and just blow him off completely, so I end up being a huge hypocrite and hang out with him anyways. Which is a shame, because I think he's becoming more and more of an ass as the days go by. He just thinks so highly of his mind, as if he's this big undiscovered genius. And I hate it when he acts that way, because he really isn't. He's a cegep student, not much better or worse than any other cegep student. He can put ideas together in his head, what a big deal. So can everyone else. I don't know, I used to think he was really nice and a little insecure, but now I'm not so sure. I actually think his attitude might have something to do with him being really insecure, but it's certainly not getting him very far.
I hate the way he looks down on me as if I was just an ignorant little girl. If I tell him not to do something because it offends me or because it's just plain mean, he gives a little laugh as if to say: "You're so cute when you get mad." which obviously doesn't help at all. I use to really like Marco, he was a lot of fun. And now I can hardly stand him, and I think it's really sad.
Okay, so that was a tangent. What I was setting out to say was that I can't wait to get into university because I find that going to cegep so far away just complicates things more than it should, and I just want to have an acceptable comuting time instead of three hours a day. I miss the theatre, and I miss my extra-curriculars. I miss my friends. And now that I've done something very, very general, I'd like to move on to something more specific. I really like that program at Ryerson, it's looking amazing. And I think I really would like to move in with my sister and the Boy. I had so much fun with them during March break, I couldn't believe it. And if only for a semester, I think it would be a really fun experiment to live with them. When I went it felt like family, but in a good way, sort of like a best friend would. I don't think they would act like over-protective hens at all, but they'd be able to show me the city and most of all provide wicked awesome company. I love them.
And while I'm acting spoiled and whiny (I'm allowed to, this is my blog), I also can't wait to get my laptop. In about a year from now I will. The new mac os will be out and probably cheaper than it is now, and since I'm moving out no matter what for university I will definitely need a computer. And as much as I love Archibald, I must admit that he's a little clunky for a small apartment. Not to mention he's not exactly portable. And call me weird, but I really, really despise using the school computers. They're old and slow and I can only use them in rooms filled with people trying to be quiet, so there's a constant shuffling going on that's a little irritating. Plus you always feel rushed in case someone might be waiting to use a computer, and if I'm writting an essay, I need to take breaks every once in a while and just surf aimlessly, it helps me regain my focus. And I always feel bad if I do that at school. Not to mention that if I don't have my usb stick with me I have to save on the school computers and send it to myself through email afterwords, which is another nuissance.
Jesus Murphy, I know some kids are dying of starvation out there. And I recongize that I am lucky to get any sort of computer at all. I guess this is part of Mr. Smith's human condition. We always want the things we can't always have.
I've been hanging out with Thea and friends all week-end, and I've decided that I can't fucking wait until I go to university. I'm serious, I really want to get out of cegep. I'm pretty sure the only thing that I want to stay for is to learn how to play guitar next semester. Other than that I just can't wait. I mean, Marco is being kind of an ass-hole lately, but he's still sort of the only person that I can hang out with most of the time, and I don't want to be totally mean and just blow him off completely, so I end up being a huge hypocrite and hang out with him anyways. Which is a shame, because I think he's becoming more and more of an ass as the days go by. He just thinks so highly of his mind, as if he's this big undiscovered genius. And I hate it when he acts that way, because he really isn't. He's a cegep student, not much better or worse than any other cegep student. He can put ideas together in his head, what a big deal. So can everyone else. I don't know, I used to think he was really nice and a little insecure, but now I'm not so sure. I actually think his attitude might have something to do with him being really insecure, but it's certainly not getting him very far.
I hate the way he looks down on me as if I was just an ignorant little girl. If I tell him not to do something because it offends me or because it's just plain mean, he gives a little laugh as if to say: "You're so cute when you get mad." which obviously doesn't help at all. I use to really like Marco, he was a lot of fun. And now I can hardly stand him, and I think it's really sad.
Okay, so that was a tangent. What I was setting out to say was that I can't wait to get into university because I find that going to cegep so far away just complicates things more than it should, and I just want to have an acceptable comuting time instead of three hours a day. I miss the theatre, and I miss my extra-curriculars. I miss my friends. And now that I've done something very, very general, I'd like to move on to something more specific. I really like that program at Ryerson, it's looking amazing. And I think I really would like to move in with my sister and the Boy. I had so much fun with them during March break, I couldn't believe it. And if only for a semester, I think it would be a really fun experiment to live with them. When I went it felt like family, but in a good way, sort of like a best friend would. I don't think they would act like over-protective hens at all, but they'd be able to show me the city and most of all provide wicked awesome company. I love them.
And while I'm acting spoiled and whiny (I'm allowed to, this is my blog), I also can't wait to get my laptop. In about a year from now I will. The new mac os will be out and probably cheaper than it is now, and since I'm moving out no matter what for university I will definitely need a computer. And as much as I love Archibald, I must admit that he's a little clunky for a small apartment. Not to mention he's not exactly portable. And call me weird, but I really, really despise using the school computers. They're old and slow and I can only use them in rooms filled with people trying to be quiet, so there's a constant shuffling going on that's a little irritating. Plus you always feel rushed in case someone might be waiting to use a computer, and if I'm writting an essay, I need to take breaks every once in a while and just surf aimlessly, it helps me regain my focus. And I always feel bad if I do that at school. Not to mention that if I don't have my usb stick with me I have to save on the school computers and send it to myself through email afterwords, which is another nuissance.
Jesus Murphy, I know some kids are dying of starvation out there. And I recongize that I am lucky to get any sort of computer at all. I guess this is part of Mr. Smith's human condition. We always want the things we can't always have.
posted by curli at 9:59 AM
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